August 7, 2013

Protocol Arrived

Okay, this is happening so very fast. I mean time was creeping by it seemed leading up to my last two transfers. Now, things are happening so very quickly!

I opened my inbox and there was my protocol from Katie, my nurse, from the NEDC. I cannot believe I need to call and schedule my ultrasound appointments, order my box of medications, and type up my dosing chart to hang in the bathroom. I am still shaking my head as I type this!

Exciting, for sure, but lots of butterflies are included as well! There are so many thoughts running through my head. I read on a fellow EA cycle momma's blog recently about feeling detached after so much loss going through EA and that post has stuck with me. Am I truly busy with all the kiddos this summer and our back to school prep or am I, in a way, "detaching" myself from the possible pain and loss after going through 2 miscarriages with EA in the last 5 months?

This is definitely something I need to consider. Because although the latter would be understandable, it would not be what I need to do. I need to trust the Lord and not be fearful. I need to be humbled that the Lord chose us even one more time to adopt little babies from the freezer once again. I need to approach this adoption like all the others. These are little lives who Rhea and I already love. I need to look forward to our "Gotcha Day" just as I would if we were going to fly to bring home our child from China. So, whether I am just very busy or whether I am truly distancing myself from this upcoming FET to protect emotions, either way, it's time I focus on my body and preparing it to receive our new babies and surrendering my fears and anxiety to the Lord. He will carry me through!

5 comments:

  1. Amen, sister! Love your thinking, always! Praying for you all as you approach another transfer!

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  2. I just received my protocol today too. Things are starting to feel real!

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  3. How exciting! Praying for you as you prepare for your cycle. :)

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  4. I was just thinking of you tonight. Peace to you friend!

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  5. So exciting! Praying for you!

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